Wednesday, 24 November 2010

.first things first.

my first post!  

i guess i should introduce myself - i am maria, a 30-year old photographer from los angeles.  recently, my husband and i moved to england to be closer to his family, and raise our own family...that's where the pregnant stuff comes in.  i am expecting our first child - a baby boy - on january 9th, 2011.  we are naming him jackson christopher, and couldn't be more excited to welcome him into the world...i said excited, not ready.

how terrifying is it to become a parent for the first time?!  i mean, having the responsibility to name a human is enough, let alone the responsibility of guiding this little human into a happy, well adjusted, successful adult.  it's enough to make you cringe - you question if you, yourself are a happy, well adjusted, successful adult. 
well, are you?  am i?  uh, sort of..

once you get past the initial shock, then you get happy, and then you get terrified again, and this is the cycle.  currently, i am in happyville - this could change at any time. now don't get me wrong, i am happy and excited all the time about having a little miracle to call my own, but the sheer terror i speak of can take the lead at any given moment.  like when you think about "omg, how the HELL do i use this nose frida thing?!  wait, i have to literally suck the snot out of this tube??" or "how will i know if there is something seriously wrong with him - am i gonna be one of those psycho moms who hover over the crib?!" to even as simple as "which freakin humidifier do i get - the cool mist that could have more bacteria, or the warm one, which kills bacteria, but could be dangerous because it heats up.....and let's not even talk about the noise it makes, the percentage of humidity it puts out, and how difficult it is to clean the damn thing!"

i mean, having a baby is intense!

and people, can we talk about what goes on with our bodies for a sec....i'm just sayin

so, this will be a journal.  a memoir of my time as a 30 year old, pregnant first-timer. i am hoping it won't stop there, either.  i hope to continue once jax is born, so i can tell you what it's like to have bodily fluids on you all the time, and how to combat a tired, crying, stubborn 2-year old.

bear with me, it could get bumpy!  i am hoping that some of you will be able to relate, or if you find yourself knocked up and terrified - you will see that you are not alone.  and if you aren't pregnant, or a guy, i hope it helps you understand what we go through, deal with, and can find it as funny as i do - (most of the time).

i leave you with a picture of our first ultrasound - when jackson was just a peanut, seahorse, alien creature.  (he was totally cute even then).

and a picture of me taken the same day as the ultrasound (i was already about 3 months here)

notice my little boobies - haha, not anymore!  i hope i get to keep em!



  1. What a great start to this blog! I'm looking forward to more posts and, of course, to Jax's arrival :)

  2. Great Start! Can't wait to read more about you and your sweet little family. Best of luck to you.

  3. I LOVE it Maria. I am soooo happy for you. I cant wait to keep reading about you and your baby bump. Congrats.... and England is an AMAZING place. I am sooo jealous, I wish I lived there. I loved it when I was there for almost 2 weeks. - Jamie Lewis